November 16, 2010
"I Can Only Imagine" - Mercy Me
Sorry if you were expecting an entry about my adventures abroad, but I've been feeling extremely restless lately and just really needed to blog about this today.
This song is so powerful and so beautiful - it sets me right back to what matters the most, the beauty of the Cross and how absolutely amazing it would be when I finally come face-to-face with HIM.
It's always absolutely so amazing when God intervenes. I was walking back from a pleasant dinner with some friends today when God intervened. I had a rough day but a great dinner with friends - but the cold 30-minute walk back to my room got me down again, worried about my upcoming deadlines with papers and just annoyed with small things in life. A phrase kept popping up over and over again in my mind: "But God. But God. But God..."
Now that may sound really strange, but it comes from Ephesians 2:4-6: "But God, who is rich in mercy, out of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead through our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with him, and made us sit with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus..."
These verses come after Apostle Paul paints a gloomy picture of how we were dead in our sins, following the ways of the world and our sinful nature (Ephesians 2:1-3). BUT GOD. This is important because... BUT GOD intervenes when we feel like we suck at life. He raises us up with Christ Jesus. He breathes into us LIFE that is irreplaceable and indescribable to the world.
He did it when I first believed. And He does it over and over again. BUT GOD. Because of His love and His grace, He intervenes even when I collapse over and over again in my trespasses. He sits me up in the throne next to Jesus. He holds my hand and calms me down. He puts in me a song like "I Can Only Imagine" to remind me of how merciful He is and what I am living for.
Once again, I'm really sorry if you were expecting an update since I haven't in so long. You can just ignore this post...or...actually if you're still reading that means you made it this far and clearly haven't ignored it. If you don't know who He is yet - just give the song a listen. Ask me about it if you haven't. And know this: you know that empty feeling you get at the end of the day that you know can't be filled by love, friendship, good grades, good job, money, etcetc? HE is the ONLY thing that can satisfy. We were made to know His glory and His love for us.
:)
Hopefully, I'll be able to update soon with day 28 soon!
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
The Fantastic Four, Erasers, Chaos, and a Little Bit of Faith
August 31, 2010
A quick entry here before I go to bed...
Today was a struggle for me at work - two of the teachers at the Learning Center were absent, so the rest of us all had to squeeze as many kids as we can into our classrooms. I ended up having to "adopt" 4th and 5th graders into my middle school classroom, and it was an absolute chaos. The most notorious four students in the entire Learning Center were placed together in my classroom (the "Fantastic Four" as my sister calls them), and I almost broke down and cried at how terrible they were.
The entire day was filled with "Teacher! He said that #($@#*#JDSF" and "TEACHER! I need help!" and "TEACHER! He keeps on pushing me!" and "TEACHER! He's not giving me the eraser!" and "Can I go to the bathroom?" and "How come he gets a star and I don't?" and...oh my, I can go on forever.
Needless to say, I was exhausted from dealing with 20-some 3rd-8th graders all in the same classroom, and by lunch I was in such a crabby mood that I just wanted to put my head down and get away.
In the midst of all this, a sweet moment ensued.
One of our "Fantastic Four" threw an eraser across the room at another student, who then went on to blame another member of the "Fantastic Four" (but not the actual culprit). Trouble followed as the wrongly accused student bursted out in anger and frustration while everyone called him a liar. He was already off his seat, screaming at everyone and swearing on "his life" and "God" and everything else he can think of to defend himself. I understood where the other kids came from, however; this particular student was usually the one behind this nonsense of throwing objects at other students. The situation was quickly getting out of hand, and I pulled the wrongly accused student away from the rest of them in an attempt to calm him down.
I told him, "I trust you. I believe you when you said you didn't throw the eraser at him."
He answered, a bit calmer, "But _______ said that no one believes me except the teacher."
I told him, "I believe you. And God believes you, if you are telling the truth. Isn't that all that matters?"
He looked at me for a moment, then looked down, and nodded. Then he silently went back to work.
This little scene touched me so much. Isn't it wonderful how amazing our God is and how true his justice is? I hope to apply the advice that I told the student in my own life when I feel like I've been wronged. Our Heavenly Father always knows the truth, as He can see our inner heart motives...and isn't that what matters? No need to justify and defend myself all the time...
I am learning so much from these kids, even though on days like these when all I want to do is just quit and walk out. I pray each day that I can be a little more patient, a little more loving, and a little more of a reflection of God for these little individuals who still need a lot of guidance. :)
A quick entry here before I go to bed...
Today was a struggle for me at work - two of the teachers at the Learning Center were absent, so the rest of us all had to squeeze as many kids as we can into our classrooms. I ended up having to "adopt" 4th and 5th graders into my middle school classroom, and it was an absolute chaos. The most notorious four students in the entire Learning Center were placed together in my classroom (the "Fantastic Four" as my sister calls them), and I almost broke down and cried at how terrible they were.
The entire day was filled with "Teacher! He said that #($@#*#JDSF" and "TEACHER! I need help!" and "TEACHER! He keeps on pushing me!" and "TEACHER! He's not giving me the eraser!" and "Can I go to the bathroom?" and "How come he gets a star and I don't?" and...oh my, I can go on forever.
Needless to say, I was exhausted from dealing with 20-some 3rd-8th graders all in the same classroom, and by lunch I was in such a crabby mood that I just wanted to put my head down and get away.
In the midst of all this, a sweet moment ensued.
One of our "Fantastic Four" threw an eraser across the room at another student, who then went on to blame another member of the "Fantastic Four" (but not the actual culprit). Trouble followed as the wrongly accused student bursted out in anger and frustration while everyone called him a liar. He was already off his seat, screaming at everyone and swearing on "his life" and "God" and everything else he can think of to defend himself. I understood where the other kids came from, however; this particular student was usually the one behind this nonsense of throwing objects at other students. The situation was quickly getting out of hand, and I pulled the wrongly accused student away from the rest of them in an attempt to calm him down.
I told him, "I trust you. I believe you when you said you didn't throw the eraser at him."
He answered, a bit calmer, "But _______ said that no one believes me except the teacher."
I told him, "I believe you. And God believes you, if you are telling the truth. Isn't that all that matters?"
He looked at me for a moment, then looked down, and nodded. Then he silently went back to work.
This little scene touched me so much. Isn't it wonderful how amazing our God is and how true his justice is? I hope to apply the advice that I told the student in my own life when I feel like I've been wronged. Our Heavenly Father always knows the truth, as He can see our inner heart motives...and isn't that what matters? No need to justify and defend myself all the time...
I am learning so much from these kids, even though on days like these when all I want to do is just quit and walk out. I pray each day that I can be a little more patient, a little more loving, and a little more of a reflection of God for these little individuals who still need a lot of guidance. :)
Saturday, August 7, 2010
A Good Reminder
August 7, 2010
I came across this the other day and had meant to repost it for a while now, but it wasn't until today that I finally got around to doing it.
I came across this the other day and had meant to repost it for a while now, but it wasn't until today that I finally got around to doing it.
TEN THINGS GOD WON’T ASK ON THAT DAY.
1…. God won’t ask what kind of car you drove. He’ll ask how many people you
drove who didn’t have transportation..
2…. God won’t ask the square footage of your house, He’ll ask how many people
you welcomed into your home.
3…. God won’t ask about the clothes you had in your closet, He’ll ask how many you helped to clothe.
4…. God won’t ask what your highest salary was. He’ll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.
5…. God won’t ask what your job title was. He’ll ask if you performed your
job to the best of your ability.
6…. God won’t ask how many friends you had. He’ll ask how many people to
whom you were a friend.
7…. God won’t ask in what neighborhood you lived, He’ll ask how you treated your neighbors.
8…. God won’t ask about the color of your skin, He’ll ask about the content
of your character.
9…. God won’t ask why it took you so long to seek Salvation. He’ll lovingly
take you to your mansion in heaven, and not to the gates of Hell.
10…. God won’t have to ask how many people you forwarded this to, He already knows your decision.
Obviously, I'm not in an email kind of situation right now and therefore not in the position to "forward" this message, but I just wanted to keep it here, in my own little space, in case I needed the reminder.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Dream
July 20, 2010
http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2010/07/dreams-gaussian-blur-and-prepubescent-boys/
I really needed this today, especially after a rather difficult spiritual conversation with a friend just two hours ago.
http://www.ragamuffinsoul.com/2010/07/dreams-gaussian-blur-and-prepubescent-boys/
I really needed this today, especially after a rather difficult spiritual conversation with a friend just two hours ago.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Books and Epiphanies
Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
The Time Traveler's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
Bleak House - Charles Dickens
Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
Animal Farm - George Orwell
The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
The Five People You Meet in Heaven - Mitch Albom
Crossing off another one from the summer reading list.
I really, really, did not like The Time Traveler's Wife - I finished the book in less than a day, and I was so upset about the book that I vented to my sister for about half a day afterwards. Ugh. Unfortunately (or fortunately), I did not have Internet for about 4 more days after my post-reading venting session that I became exhausted and will not be dedicating this blog post to listing reasons on why I didn't like the book.
I'll just say a few words on it: there was too much unnecessary sex, and the characters were completely flat. They didn't develop at all throughout the novel! There was nothing to explore. Yeah, the ending was "sad" - but not the type of sadness that deeply entrenches you for days onwards, but it seemed like the sadness was completely shallow. The plot was very interesting, I'd give the author that. It definitely put a new twist to the concept of time travel but ugh, the characters were so boring...
ANYWAY.
I had an epiphany the other day.
It's an epiphany that repeats itself over and over again, but every single time, it's just so fulfilling and overwhelming that it can be given the heavy title of an epiphany each time.
I was praying the other night and felt so...complete. It's something that is repeated over and over again in those sermons, taught to us over and over again - but it is so true. Only God can fulfill that emptiness that all of us feel at the end of the day. Not love. Not friends. Not family. Only Christ. It's so wonderful to be completely satisfied, calm and at ease. In those moments, when I feel nothing else around me except for God, with no distractions, no worries about Internships and what-not, no stressing over relationships - that's when I feel so overwhelmed and blessed by His presence that I want nothing more but to stay there forever, with Him alone.
And I thought, this is what Heaven must be.
100% satisfaction, just worshipping Him for who He is. I think I figured it out. People repeat this phrase a lot too, but I don't think I fully grasped the concept of it until very recently: God is love. God is 100% pure love. And that is why God alone is enough to satisfy ALL of our needs. Bathed with His presence, I feel love surrounding me to a degree that everything else in the world seems so small.
I'll just say a few words on it: there was too much unnecessary sex, and the characters were completely flat. They didn't develop at all throughout the novel! There was nothing to explore. Yeah, the ending was "sad" - but not the type of sadness that deeply entrenches you for days onwards, but it seemed like the sadness was completely shallow. The plot was very interesting, I'd give the author that. It definitely put a new twist to the concept of time travel but ugh, the characters were so boring...
ANYWAY.
I had an epiphany the other day.
It's an epiphany that repeats itself over and over again, but every single time, it's just so fulfilling and overwhelming that it can be given the heavy title of an epiphany each time.
I was praying the other night and felt so...complete. It's something that is repeated over and over again in those sermons, taught to us over and over again - but it is so true. Only God can fulfill that emptiness that all of us feel at the end of the day. Not love. Not friends. Not family. Only Christ. It's so wonderful to be completely satisfied, calm and at ease. In those moments, when I feel nothing else around me except for God, with no distractions, no worries about Internships and what-not, no stressing over relationships - that's when I feel so overwhelmed and blessed by His presence that I want nothing more but to stay there forever, with Him alone.
And I thought, this is what Heaven must be.
100% satisfaction, just worshipping Him for who He is. I think I figured it out. People repeat this phrase a lot too, but I don't think I fully grasped the concept of it until very recently: God is love. God is 100% pure love. And that is why God alone is enough to satisfy ALL of our needs. Bathed with His presence, I feel love surrounding me to a degree that everything else in the world seems so small.
He is jealous for me
Loves like a hurricane
I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
- "Oh, How He Loves Us" by the David Crowder Band
This song's been on repeat on my iTunes the past week, and the bolded phrase strikes me every single time. It so beautifully captures the "epiphany" that I feel every time I surround myself completely to God, one-on-one.
Honestly, I suck. A lot. In so many ways. But He is more than enough.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
