A little diversion to the side...

(A small diversion from my Study Abroad "Day Journals"...)
Time is flying by, slipping away from my fingers, fading by way too quickly.

Strange how these thoughts came up when I am sitting right now in a coffee shop (that has become my favorite since day 1 here in Cardiff) and doing some work. I am reading an article by Stuart Hall on cultural representation and race...the meaning of differences and all the theories behind them. It's quite interesting and something that interests me very much (that's why I am a communication major). Throughout his article, Hall mentions Roland Barthes a lot - which is continuously reminding me of my internship over the summer at the ICI.

I miss interning at the ICI a lot.  It was such an amazing experience of cultural analysis, discussions that would get my brain flowing like none other. I met such great people.

I'm struggling to make a decision about staying here for an entire year or leave as planned in December after just one semester abroad. Whenever I am meeting new people or hanging out with some people whom I've become very fond of in such a short amount of time, I really wish I can stay for a whole year and get the full-on experience of student life at Cardiff. This struck me especially when I was looking into the different ministries that CU runs yesterday (yeah, I'm not there in my "day journals" yet...I'll get there eventually) - there are things that I would have started this semester but would never be able to see how it ends.

I received an email from a friend back in Penn with some mischievous(?) happenings of our group of friends that got me wishing I could be there and here simultaneously. Then, I felt: "that's where I belong." They've become my home at Penn. But I've started to establish a home here too. Walking down the street and hearing, "Hi Ellie!" from a new friend (everyone calls me Ellie here...I started introducing myself as this pet name at first because Alisha and my names were so similar that people got confused, then I realized that Ellie is much easier to pronounce...now it's just gotten stuck) makes me feel like I am home here too.

Where was I going with this entry...?

Oh yeah. Time is flying by. I don't like it one bit. Life has become all about readjusting...adjusting from LA to Penn, from Penn back to LA, from LA now to Cardiff - and in the future, whenever I decide to be back, from Cardiff to Penn. It's so weird how I'm already forgetting what Penn is like as university life here has overwhelmed my so-called "college experience".

One thing remains firm though, whether I decide to stay here for a year or leave after this semester: studying abroad was the best decision I ever made in College, along with joining APO.

:)

Goodbye, Summer 2010.

September 20, 2010

"There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it."
- Edith Wharton

This little notebook was my sidekick throughout my adventures(?) during the summer of 2010. This book marks the three different chapters of my life (although "chapters" is not the precise word to note my summer since all three parts took place simultaneously). It's kind of serving as a "time capsule" for my hectic summer, and I think it'll be a nice tradition to uphold throughout the different stages in my life.

I'm the type of person who loves scribbling notes - although I am basically inseparable from my computer (sad, I know), I prefer to brainstorm and write notes down on a piece of paper rather than on a word document. It's just the way I do things.

The book is pretty much finalized now (although there is absolutely nothing final about it) - and here is a little glimpse into what is in each tab of the book (and therefore a glimpse into the three different parts of my summer):

Chapter 1: My internship with GAP

The first tab indicates the first internship that I started with a non-profit autism organization. On the right of the picture is a page from that tab...my incredibly messy notes from one of our weekly meetings in WeHo. A lot of my job involved contacting organizations for sponsorships as well as getting word out about the event. Although the actual day of the event was fun (as I went kayaking for the first time ever!), I don't think I'll do it again if I were given the chance. We really lacked the resources we needed for our efforts to be effective - things were just so disorganized all the time!

Enter Chapter 2: My internship with the ICI

A glimpse into my internship

My second internship over the summer was really awesome. The two pages above show the variety of tasks I was given in a particular week - everything from researching Internet tools for the Institute to use to managing a blog was fair game! It was a really amazing experience. Everyday, my critical thinking levels were challenged as my meetings with the Director led into discussions about society, culture, communication, the Internet...I realized so many things about the Internet, non-profit world and relationships among people through this internship. Love, love, love. I found that this internship was really perfect for me - I would love to do something like this for a career.  Above all, I think I really need to be around people who analyze culture almost instinctively - I love having interesting conversations that trigger thoughts in my head to such an extent that I am reminded of it throughout my non-work everyday life.

Enter Chapter 3: Part-time job at TLC

A glimpse into everyday life at TLC

And finally...Chapter 3: TLC. As I have noted in my previous entry, I worked at the same Learning Center for 3 consecutive summers. I won't go into much detail about my experience there (as I have multiple blog entries about it), but here is a glimpse of what my days were like while teaching! On the left is my little "grading sheet" that kept track of where each student was in terms of grammar packets (some kids came later, that's why there are so many blank spaces...others were on different levels, some always came late and never did grammar packets). Note the big "LOST" on one of the spaces. It's so typical of them to lose packets...*sigh*. The page on the right shows an agenda that I had planned on a day-to-day basis as well as a seating chart I had to implement due to high levels of noise. The seating chart is incomplete though - I had way more kids than that at one point! It was quite tricky to break-up "pairs" of friends on completely different parts of the classroom - oh the life of a teacher.

Throughout the summer, I was very rarely found without that pink notebook in hand. Now, I put the pink notebook away and along with it all the memories of this summer. It's been an extremely long break (I can't believe I have been home since May 18th!), but it was very productive. Now it's time to enter Fall 2010 - hello, Wales!

Is it really...over?

September 10, 2010

the last stack of papers

I can't believe it's all over.

My two internships and part-time job - they're all finished. Completed. Done.

This past Wednesday was my last day at the learning center - and on Tuesday night, I graded my last stack of papers. I don't know if the picture above truly indicates how big these stacks of paper were that I had to deal with on an every-other-day basis, but they were quite a pain. Countless journals, vocabulary sentences, reading packets, grammar packets, writing packets...but I am going to miss the small surprises that I received as I went through them (as I have noted in my previous entries) and all the lessons I learned from them.

I was kind of sad that so few kids were remaining on my last day of work, and some of my favorites had already quit (yes, teachers always do have favorites!) - but I was happy to get out of there having experienced some of the sweetest moments I had in all three summers of my teaching experience. Honestly though, it's harder and harder to get attached to the kids at a personal level each year. I haven't figured out why this is - maybe the attitude I come in every summer is detached every year, maybe the kids are just changing to an impersonal level, maybe the gap between the kids and me is growing as I get older. I don't know. The first summer that I taught at the learning center, I was in charge of 3rd-5th graders and a small group of middle-schoolers - but I became attached to them at the end of the summer and had known them at an intimate level. Maybe it's due to the fact that we went on a summer trip together, but the goodbye was sadder back then. In fact, I felt weird at the end of Wednesday that I didn't feel very attached to these kids at all. Maybe it's due to the fact that this summer, I was only at the learning center on Mondays and Wednesdays, from 8am to 3pm, as opposed to last two summers where I was there full time from 8am to 6pm, Monday-Thursday.

Whatever the reason may be for my particular detachment from the kids this summer, I am done with the learning center. I wish I can see them grow to mature little beings (and see 'M' get his "mastery degree" from Harvard at age 20), but this is where my "fate" with them ends. I have come to realize that connections between people - "destiny and fate" between two people - cannot be forged, manipulated or forced. If it's meant to be, we'll see each other again someday. If it's meant to be, we'll be in each other's lives even if we will against it. That's just how life goes.

I totally didn't expect this entry on saying goodbye to the learning center to end up being this lengthy and was thus planning to write on my final roles as an intern on this post as well - but that will just have to wait for another day.

Summer is coming to a close. I'm honestly scared for what's coming up next.